I Would Like to Go Inside My Dad’s Brain by Haley Savage

I Would Like to Go Inside My Dad’s Brain
By Haley Savage from Franklin High School
Published in the 2006-2007 WITS Anthology Mostly What I’m Made Of

I would like to go inside my dad’s brain, so that I could change the way he now feels about me. So he wouldn’t assume I wanted to run away. I wanna be in my dad’s brain so I can be his best friend again and so I’m not a failure in his eyes.
I wanna go inside my dad’s brain so he will look at me as his little girl again. So I’m not just a mistake.
I wanna go inside my dad’s brain to make it all better, so I can take back the hurt I caused him. I wanna go inside my dad’s brain so I could bring my best friend back.
If I could go inside my dad’s brain I would see all the hockey games, games we played, all the faces we made at each other, I’d see all the great times we had, all the times we laughed, I’d see how happy we used to be…what he thought of me before I said it. Before I said I wanted to leave, to move out.
I would feel a long bit of happiness, but then a sudden cold, bitter sadness. I would attempt to touch his heart again,
which has been crushed, broken, stepped on…
“I’m sorry,” I would cry.
“I’m sorry I let you down.”
“Let me back in!” I’d shout.
“Please…please,” I’d whimper.
“I’ll be a better daughter, just give me one more chance… please,” I would plead.
“Please,” I say quietly. I’m tired now… I can ‘t yell anymore.
“I love you,” I whisper softly before I completely fade away.
“I love you.”